Hang on to Your Youth


I was at the car wash this morning because my little guy had decided to sleep longer than usual and my husband was working from home.  It was a peaceful morning consisting of a dropping my oldest off at school, a trip to the grocery store, and then the luxury car wash stop where I could scroll Facebook while my car washed (without feeling guilty).  As I pulled through to the dryers I sat and watched a guy parked by the vacuums, hand drying his truck.  He was young, my age, in his 30s I’d say.  He was the stereotypical young guy with some cash.  His truck was really big, really black, and really shiny.  I giggled as I watched him dry his chrome wheels and just thought for a second how I have never cared about anything other than having a rinsed off car without bird poop. I wondered where he found the time to care or bother with such things.  I dreamed for a second about what it might be like for him.  Maybe he’s single, or at the very least doesn’t have kids and cleaning his car is actually worth it because it stays clean. The chicks probably dig it, I guess.  I have no clue.  When I met my husband he was borrowing an old jeep from a friend because he didn’t even own a car.  The jeep didn’t have doors either.  And it was…yellow.  My favorite part was how he drove with his left foot hanging outside the jeep.  That was hot to me.  There was definitely no shine to the jeep and it was a total buzz kill when I found out it didn’t even belong to him.  I married him anyway though.

So, as I sat watching this guy and dreaming of childless days where priorities where a wee bit different a second guy caught my eye.  Very cute, small, well built man.  My age again.  Backwards cap, tight fitted flannel shirt, those Levi’s jeans from the Diet Coke commercials, and loosely laced tennis shoes.  The outfit said it all for me.  Hanging on to his youth, possibly by a thread as he also dried the shit out of his car.  He looked like he was working hard.  He looked like he cared about what he was doing.  I saw him glimpse at the man with the big shiny penis enlarging black truck and for that split second I could see into his soul.  It was really a split second, but there was a moment.  A moment of envy.  The same feeling I had for a moment.  I was thinking about the time to do something for myself that I truly cared about.  To have it just the way I liked it without anyone messing it up.  He was probably thinking ‘lucky bastard’ or something to that effect as he went back to drying the shit out of his 2000 navy blue Dodge Grand Caravan. That van likely carries more than one child and he’s likely in charge of getting them wherever they need to go.  Maybe he doesn’t work (because it’s 9am on a Thursday) and all this guy’s got at this point is his tight jeans and clean van.

I laughed.  I giggled.  I smiled all the way home.  I get it man!  I totally get it!